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Your child does not need to see you happy and smiling all the time

13/9/2017

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A lot of parents I know - feel compelled to look happy and calm all the time in front of their children.

They feel guilty if they lose their tempers and get angry and upset when their children are around.

But this is a classical example of unnecessary guilt.

Children need to be aware of all kinds of emotions.

A truly emotionally healthy child is one who is familiar with both positive and negative emotions and is able to handle both kinds of emotions when he encounters them in himself and others.

A child who has never seen an adult get angry - may be shattered when his teacher scolds him in school

A child who has never encountered conflict at home may not be able to cope when he has a fight with his friends.

In addition a child who has never been exposed to negative emotions - may experience serious guilt when he himself feels angry or sad or upset because he may feel that he is the only one with these terrible feelings.

As parents we want to give our children the best of everything - but however good positive emotions may look - surrounding children in a non-stop flow of smiles and laughter may be harmful as well

One of the cardinal rules of good parenting is honesty

Be honest with your child. Do not pretend.

Your child needs you - just like you are - with your mix of positive and negative emotions. He does not need the person you are pretending to be. 
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