 Make every BITE count
Children don't like to spend hours eating. Add nuts and seeds to roti dough to ensure that your child gets everything from a few bites For more information, join our community: http://bit.ly/wpacommunity  INSTANT GRATIFICATION is not always bad
Use it to teach your child the value of HARDWORK through CHORES When sweep the floor... And it becomes clean.... That is instant gratification And shows you the value of hard work For more information, join our community: http://bit.ly/wpacommunity  The pandemic is our golden opportunity to teach children about COURAGE in ADVERSITY
Are you setting a good example? For more information, join our community: http://bit.ly/wpacommunity  Don't get upset if your child DEMANDS things
Teach them how to ask politely. They ask because they NEED And they know they can turn to you for their needs  Don't INSTRUCT
Just INSPIRE Children are waiting to follow you. Do what you want them to do  I love it that every event that I am invited for – is filled with amazing moments of connection like this one.
When parents complain about not having enough time to connect with their children – all I want to tell them is that connecting with a child does not take all day. Just catch your child’s eye and smile whenever you have the chance. A mischievous smile – a loving smile – a reassuring smile – a ‘no don’t do that smile’. We often connect with our children with frowns and glares. Just replace those with twinkling eyes and a fun smile and fill your life with memorable moments.  Whenever I have the opportunity to interact with children from orphanages - I always organise games for them.
Because I believe - that more than anything else – children need the opportunity to play. And when I play with these children - it breaks my heart to see how well behaved these tiny little creatures are. If you ask them to shout they look around in fear. If you ask them to jump they give a small little jump – they never leap with all their might. They know that their survival depends on constantly behaving well because they don’t have parents who love them unconditionally. Our children are boisterous and naughty at home because they can be – because they have our unconditional love. Let’s take a moment to be grateful for that Not everyone has what we have. More than anything else.... Children need to play. If your child cannot go out to play.... You need to become playful and childlike and play with them.  A lady calls me to ask about my prenatal classes – the breastfeeding classes in particular
“What stage of your pregnancy are you in?” I ask I am not pregnant yet – but I want to attend the class before I get pregnant because this time I want to get it right. I didn’t get you – I say I just lost my newborn baby – she says bursting into tears. And everyone says it is because I did not breastfeed him right. I am horrified. I am not sure who would be cruel enough to say such a thing – but apparently the world is full of such people. I speak to her for the next hour – trying to reassure her and then I ask her to call and consult with a psychiatrist friend for further help. I am all for breastfeeding. Yes breast milk is the best. Yes breastfeeding is the best. And believe me most mothers know that now and try their best. But for whatever reason if they can’t breastfeed – let’s not be so unkind to them. As the Breastfeeding week comes to an end – lets’ pledge to help new mothers to breastfeed – let us understand that breastfeeding requires time and patience – let us be kind and forgiving with them and cut them some slack. And let us definitely not judge them if for some reason they can’t breastfeed. Let us be kind. Let us be empathetic. And the world will automatically be a place where more mothers can successfully breastfeed for longer.  At a consultation the other day – a very hassled mom said she was tired of telling her son to study. She complained that her son was only interested in getting dressed up in fancy clothes and going out with his friends. Despite his plunging marks – he was not putting in the effort required to score better marks. She had read somewhere that children – especially teenagers – needed to be told in so many words – what the consequences of their actions would be – and she had done so. But that had not helped. If anything, she thought that the more she told her son about the consequences of his actions – the more he stayed away from home. Here is what I explained to her – “Your son does not need to hear from you what the consequences of his actions will be. He already knows that. And to distract himself he is focusing on getting dressed and hanging out with friends” The problem here is that he has no idea how to study what he needs to study. He has probably studied and not scored well once or twice – and is now convinced that he is ‘dumb’ and that is why is afraid of studying. Because it reinforces his belief in the fact that he is ‘dumb’. You need to help him with studying. Yes – there is no other way. No. Tuitions will not help. He has to see that he is worth your time and effort.  Have you heard that children must be praised to build their self-esteem?
Most parents I meet at parent orientations seem to have heard that. They also seem to know that they shouldn’t praise the child – they should praise the effort the child has put in. So, they know they shouldn’t call their child “talented”. Instead they should say – “I like how patiently you have been colouring that fish.” But they don’t seem to know when they should stop praising the child. Because they are praised so much - a lot of children nowadays need to be praised all the time. If they are not praised, they will start asking for praise. “Mamma – how is this?” “Mamma – Is this colour nice?” This is because they are used to working on external motivation and validation – instead of internal motivation. These children often find it difficult to settle into preschool because there they have to patiently wait and share the teacher’s attention with another 10 children – which they are not used to. If you are preparing your child for preschool – an important element of that preparation is teaching your child how to work alone for short periods of time. And teaching your child to do things for the joy of doing them – to feel capable and self-sufficient – instead of always working for praise. |
Categories
All
|
RSS Feed